


Azure

by Kate_Shepard



Series: Azure [2]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Drugs, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Mildly Dubious Consent, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn, Porn with Feelings, Shakarian - Freeform, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-28 08:19:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6322009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kate_Shepard/pseuds/Kate_Shepard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aria T'Loak hates owing people and she owes Shepard for warning her of the mercenary groups' planned overthrow of her kingdom. She decides to play matchmaker...in a very Aria kind of way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I added the dubcon tag due to the effects of the drug used. However, everything that occurs between FemShep and Garrus is consensual. The drug is just a trigger. His reservations come into play due to his C-Sec history and because this is Garrus and he's protective of Shepard, even if it means protecting her from himself. Also, I threw in some (sometimes) headcanon for the purpose of the story.
> 
> BioWare owns the Mass Effect universe and all characters. I just play with it for my own entertainment.

Shore leave on Omega was not Shepard’s idea of fun. It was too reminiscent of Garrus’ time here as Archangel and the way that both did and could have ended. She knew the station held nothing but bad memories for him and tried to avoid it but when they were already in the system and the station had what she needed to resupply, she couldn’t justify going elsewhere even if she did want nothing more than to shelter Garrus from the one place that had broken him. He understood, of course. He was a soldier after all. He would never ask her to avoid Omega just for him. That only made her feel worse.

She scanned the crowd gathered at Afterlife. The orange glow and the fact that it was on Omega always made her expect and even think of the place as filthy, but the truth was that Aria ran her business like the consummate professional. The bar was clean. The patrons didn’t dare cause significant or overt trouble. The dancers were not only well-compensated; they were directly under Aria’s protection. Even the restrooms were, well…not disgusting. There were too many elcor and krogan for them to be pleasant but they were better than she expected.

When a turian sidled up to her and said something about having a wife and a ship but only bringing one to Omega, her first response normally would have been to tell him to get lost. However, his voice was doing strange things to her heart rate and his taloned hand on her arm sent sparks racing along her skin. He wasn’t as attractive as Garrus, but her turian crewmate had been pretty clear over the time that she’d known him that he didn’t have a fetish for humans. 

She wasn’t a homewrecker but she knew that a lot of turian marriages were arranged and based on citizenship tiers and complicated protocols that she didn’t begin to understand. Chances were, the wife was also out somewhere looking for her own fun. That wouldn’t normally matter to Shepard but her inhibitions seemed to have disappeared somewhere along with the second drink the surprisingly friendly batarian bartender had made her. Maybe she could close her eyes and pretend this guy was Garrus.  
She leaned in and let her hand trail down his chest. “You don’t say,” she purred in a voice that didn’t sound like her own. 

The turian—she hadn’t caught his name and didn’t particularly care—grinned and stepped closer. She could feel the warmth of his body wrap around her and that earthy undertone that she’d come to associate with turians seeped into her heightened senses and sent a wave of heat through her. He offered to buy her next drink and the batarian prepared her another while talking surreptitiously into his comm unit. Normally, that would have made her uneasy, especially here on Omega where she refused to step foot without her armor and a full complement of weapons, but she registered it only peripherally. Her entire focus was on the turian in front of her. 

Another came up behind and leaned in as well. This one reminded her a bit of Nihlus. She’d always thought the Spectre had been attractive and had even been pretty sure he’d flirted with her a time or two. She’d actually planned on having a sit-down with him after the fateful Eden Prime mission but, of course, that hadn’t happened. This one wasn’t quite the same blood-red shade as Nihlus. His eyes were more brown than green and he didn’t have the elegant Cipitrine colony markings that Nihlus had but he was  
attractive enough and the other one didn’t seem to mind his presence. 

Shepard wasn’t promiscuous by any standards but she wasn’t a prude, either. She didn’t indulge in one-night stands but she was…enthusiastic when in a relationship. It had been a long time since she’d had one of those, though, and she’d spent far too much time waiting for her favorite turian to realize that she was a woman and not just the commander of the ship on which he served. Perhaps it was time to let loose a little.

___

Garrus scowled down at his beeping omni-tool. He wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone. He hated this station and the way that every section of it seemed to hold some memory of the time he’d spent here with his squad. There was the spot where he’d shot the vorcha threatening the elderly human couple who’d given him his nickname. There, the place where he’d met Sensat. There, the shop where they’d purchased their weapon mods. There, the place where Monteague had stopped a krogan from raping the young asari maiden they’d later learned was named Mierin. There, the transport they’d used on occasion to travel to the area of the station where their base had been located. And, of course, there was always Afterlife where he’d met the traitor Sidonis who’d helped start and end it all. 

The caller was persistent, though, and he eventually activated his omni-tool to accept the vid call. To say that he was surprised to see Aria on the line was a definite understatement. Dread pooled in his gut. He couldn’t think of any good reason why the pirate queen of Omega would want to speak to him. Not only did she want to speak to him, she’d wanted to do so badly enough that she had called directly rather than sending one of her lackeys after him. It served the additional purpose of letting him know that his omni-tool wasn’t as secure as he’d thought. He would have to get Tali to take a look at it.

He kept his voice steady as he said, “Aria.”

“Vakarian,” she purred. “I was beginning to wonder if you were going to answer.”

“What can I do for you?” he asked.

“Oh, I think you’ve done quite enough, don’t you?” she asked with a malicious glint in her eye. “Let’s just say this call is a…token of my appreciation for all of the hard work that Archangel did on my station. Garm, Jaroth, and Tarak were becoming more trouble than they were worth.”

“What do you want, Aria?” he asked, trying to keep the anger from his voice.

“Straight to business,” she said. “My kind of guy. Your commander seems to have been…exposed to something. You might want to go find her. Lower bar. I suggest you hurry, especially if she happens to be allergic to dextro. I really would like her to live long enough to get rid of those damn Collectors that keep coming onto my station.”

Garrus was running before she’d finished speaking. He considered calling for backup but didn’t think any of the others would be able to respond in time. His mind raced with possibilities as he placed a call to Mordin. “Afterlife. Now,” he said when the salarian answered. “Shepard’s been exposed to something. She’s probably been poisoned.” He cursed himself for failing to warn her about the bartender in the lower bar. The batarian had a history of poisoning humans. 

“On my way,” Mordin answered quickly.

When he reached the bar, he looked around for Shepard. His visor picked up her heat signature at the same time his eye caught on the deep blue of her armor. She was sandwiched between a pair of turians. One had his hand on her hip and the other was running his talons through her hair. She’d leaned back into the one behind her and was nibbling on his mandible as she stroked the chest of the one in front of her. The edge of a bond mark peeked out of the neck of the second one’s tunic. 

Garrus ignored the pang of something he refused to identify as jealousy and came to a sudden halt. She didn’t look poisoned or ill. In fact, she looked like she was having quite a bit of fun. He might have turned away and chalked Aria’s call up to a cruel joke if it weren’t for the fact that this behavior was so very un-Shepard. She was affectionate with her crew but he’d never seen her act like this. She was very reserved in public and he had never even seen her with a man—or a woman, for that matter. She was so very non-sexual in her interactions that he generally didn’t even think of her as having the same needs as everyone else. 

Reflexes honed by his years in C-Sec kicked in and he evaluated the situation with the eyes of an investigator rather than a friend. Her eyes were slightly glazed and her inhibitions were significantly lowered. His visor told him that both her heart rate and her temperature were elevated. Alcohol was a depressant for humans, so her pulse shouldn’t be racing the way it was. That could be due to the attentions of the turians she was draped against but she was also far less attentive to her surroundings than he’d ever seen her. Shepard never let her guard down on Omega. There were three empty glasses on the bar near her elbow. It was possible that she’d had more than that but unlikely as the batarian wasn’t particularly concerned about clearing the empty glasses away. He had seen Shepard down more than three shots of ryncol and remain standing and the color of the liquid in the bottom of one of the glasses told him that whatever she was drinking wasn’t as strong as that. Alcohol shouldn’t be affecting her behavior to this extent.

She’d been exposed to something, all right, but it wasn’t poison. He ran through a list of drugs that could cause this kind of reaction as he walked up to the trio and scented the air. He automatically disregarded the pheromones coming off of the two males. Those were easily identifiable. Shepard’s, however, were different. They were stronger than normal and there was something about them that was almost similar in a way to the asari dancers’. 

Asari appealed to almost every species for one reason or another. Their shape was appealing to humans and drell. The crest on their heads were similar to turian fringe. Their lifespans were comparable to krogan. Their mind melding capabilities were preferable to actual sex for the salarians. Their pheromones were attractive to all of the species who had the ability to smell them. 

There was only one possibility that explained everything and it made him want to rip the batarian’s eyes out one by one. The drug was an asari one that had been developed in a medical lab in an effort to find a way to counteract declining sex drives in females. Males of every species had access to medications that could help with impotence. Females, for the most part, didn’t. This drug was meant to change that. However, the formula had made it out of the lab before it had been perfected and was now used as a popular date-rape drug. Rather than render the victim unaware, it made them active participants. 

To make matters worse, the pheromones the victim released were the same cocktail that asari produced which had elements of turian, krogan, drell, and salarian female heat hormones. Those hormones were supposed to tailor themselves to the person’s partner but hadn’t yet been refined beyond species. Thus, anyone dosed with the drug was inadvertently advertising availability and simultaneously unable to turn down the interest she received. Shepard was completely at the mercy of a body that was telling her that it was imperative to breed and, apparently, her preferred species was turian.

He stepped in with a low, territorial growl that drew the attention of her…admirers. The one with the bond mark brought his hands up and said, “Hey, we didn’t know she was spoken for. Calm down.” The other had the audacity to growl back at him.  
Shepard looked up and smiled seductively at him. “Garrus,” she crooned in a voice that went straight to his groin. He cursed inwardly and called on his species famous discipline.

“Shepard,” he said, imbuing possessiveness into his subvocals. She pushed away from the turian behind her and sauntered up to him. _Spirits, grant me strength_ , he thought. He said, “Come on,” and put an arm around her to steer her away. 

“Ooh, you are sexy when you take control,” she said, wrapping an arm around his waist. “Jealous? I can hear you rumbling, you know.” She tapped her ear and said, “Cerberus fixed my hearing a little better than they anticipated, I think.”

Was she deliberately feeling him up? Her fingers were definitely stroking his waist in a way that would have been unquestionably suggestive had she been turian. Despite the fact that she had too many of them, the sensation was not at all unpleasant. “No way. I know the scars just drive you wild,” he teased lightly.

She looked up at him and he realized for the first time how very small she was. Her personality was so forceful that he’d never really noticed how diminutive her body really was until he had her flush against him. She had to peer up to look at him from this angle. It looked uncomfortable but she didn’t seem to mind. It wasn’t the first time he’d noticed how flexible humans were. “Krogan women aren’t the only ones who find scars attractive,” she said with a smile that he didn’t know how to interpret. 

Mordin met them at the door and summed up the situation in a glance. “Not poison. Azure. Problematic. No antidote. Get her to ship. Will see what I can do.”

“What’s he talking about now?” Shepard asked Garrus.

“I’ll explain when we get back to the Normandy,” he promised.

Shepard continued her flirtations as they walked back to the ship and he was glad for the doctor’s presence and his STG training because Garrus was certainly too distracted by her to guarantee his ability to get her back safely even on the short trek to the docking bay. The territorial growl that came from him whenever another turian stopped and began to move in their direction was far less affected than he wanted to admit. 

He didn’t understand his own reaction. Shepard was his commander, his best friend, and the person he respected most in the entire damn galaxy. He had accepted long ago, after her death, that his feelings for her probably ran deeper than just friendship but also that she was so far out of his league to make even the idea of being with her laughable. It almost seemed sacrilegious to think of her in that way. She needed his friendship and support. That was it. She certainly deserved better than the pitiful attentions of a failure like him. He was simply amazed that she seemed to also view him as her closest friend and that she cared at all. 

He would do absolutely anything for her and that meant, in part, keeping his feelings in check. If she knew, it would only make things awkward between them. The possibility of her reciprocating his feelings was entirely in the realm of fantasy and he wouldn’t disrespect her by indulging it. However, if she did, the best thing he could do for her was stay out of her way so that she could find someone who had at least a chance of deserving her.

He certainly had no business wanting her in this state. Due to the drug in her system, she’d likely consent to a vorcha if it meant calming the hormones screaming at her to mate. She couldn’t give informed, reasonable consent. Therefore, the things he was feeling for her right now were even more wrong than they normally were. He couldn't return her attentions and if he did, when she sobered up, she would hate him and probably leave him here on Omega to rot. It would be no less than what he deserved. No, he wouldn’t take advantage of her. He forced his rising desire back down.


	2. Chapter 2

Mordin led them up to her cabin and scanned her before Garrus released her so that she could go to her bed. He turned to go but Mordin stopped him. “Need you to stay, Vakarian.”

“What?” he asked as Shepard went into the head. 

“Someone has to stay with her. Impulse control virtually non-existent. If left alone, will return to station, seek out relief,” Mordin said.

He lowered his voice so that Shepard couldn’t hear through the door and said, “Mordin, I can’t. I’m probably the last person who needs to be here. Can’t you stay with her?”

“No,” Mordin said. “Not emergency, nothing I can do here. Daniel needs help in clinic.”

“What about one of the others?” he asked desperately. “She’s heterosexual. What about Samara or Miranda?”

“Samara unavailable. Really think she wants Miranda to see her like this?” Mordin pointed out. “Very soon, won’t care about gender. Only release. Accosting Miranda could prove problematic.”

“What about Thane, then?” he asked. “He’s got more self-control than anyone I’ve ever met.”

“Not an option,” Mordin said. “Desires commander. Only so much self-control.”

“And you think I’m different?” Garrus hissed.

“Yes,” Mordin said with a nod. “Friendship underlying hormones. Shepard amenable to you. Likely would have suggested already if able to read signals. Likely thinks you uninterested now. Won’t risk friendship without assurance of success.”

Garrus put a hand up and said, “Wait. Are you saying Shepard wants me even without the drugs?”

“Yes,” Mordin said in the same tone he would use when explaining something obvious to a child. “Has shown signs since you were brought aboard. Response to your injuries more typical of mate than friend. 

“Fuck!” Shepard said behind them as the door to the head opened. Garrus turned quickly. “All right, you guys know something I don’t. Something is wrong. This isn’t me. Spill.”

“Aware of difference in behavior,” Mordin mused. “Uncommon. Small dose? Higher tolerance? More self-aware? Interesting.”

Garrus rubbed the back of his neck and asked, “Have you ever heard of the street drug Azure?”

“The date rape drug?” she asked. “The one that makes women…oh, shit. No. Who? Damn it, I’m going to kill that damn bartender!”

“Yeah,” Garrus said slowly. “That one. You, uh, got dosed. That’s why you were hanging all over those turians at the bar and why I got you out of there. Unfortunately, Mordin seems to think it’s not safe to leave you alone. We’re trying to figure out who to ask to stay with you. He has to get back to the clinic.”

“I’ve been dosed with a drug that’s going to turn me into a raging nymphomaniac in, what, an hour or so, and you guys want to turn me over to one of the crew?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. “Who were you thinking would be a good idea? Grunt? Joker, whom I’d likely break? What about our resident assassin who just drips sex appeal and has a perfect memory? He could add this to the ones of his dead wife. That sounds like a great idea. Tali? Maybe I can scandalize her enough to send her running back to the safety of the Flotilla. Kelly? She’d probably be happy to help me out. Or, we can make this whole situation even more embarrassing and ask Miranda. Ooh, or maybe Samara or Dr. Chakwas so I can feel like I tried to rape my mom tomorrow. No. Just get EDI to lock me in.”

“You are able to hack the door,” EDI pointed out, “though that would not be necessary. I could slow you down; however, if you ordered me to open it, I would be obliged to obey.”

“Guess you’re up, then, Garrus,” she said with a sigh. Her eyes were almost pleading when she said, “I don’t trust anyone else not to use this against me later and there are a lot of people on this ship I don’t want to have sex with under any circumstances.”

“Shepard, I’m not going to—” he protested.

“I’m not asking you to,” she said, cutting him off. “I’m just asking you to keep me from going out and fucking a batarian or propositioning one of the crew. I’ve already propositioned you and you’ve seen me naked so if I end up stripping or something, it isn’t anything you haven’t seen. It’s not like we haven’t been in awkward situations together before. Besides, you don’t want me.” 

He told himself she didn’t sound disappointed on the last sentence. There was no way she was disappointed. That would mean she cared whether he wanted her or not and that made Mordin’s assertion seem all the more likely. He couldn’t allow himself to hope for that. He reminded himself that she deserved better. She could easily find something closer to her own species. Even she admitted that Thane was attractive to her and Garrus had seen the way the drell’s eyes tended to follow her. The thought of those emerald, alien hands on her body made his gullet clench but at least Thane was closer to home. 

He wanted to refuse. He wanted to walk away and pretend that none of this had ever happened and that everything would be normal again in the morning. However, when it came down to it, Shepard was asking for him specifically. She needed him. He’d always had her back before and she was vulnerable now in a way that she only trusted him to see. He wanted to ask Tali as he was sure she’d be less scandalized than Shepard thought but he didn’t know how aggressive she’d turn and if she did something to Tali’s suit and the quarian got sick, she’d never forgive herself. At least he could physically hold her off if necessary. 

“All right, Shepard,” he said. 

“Good,” Mordin said. “Call if you need me. Should wear off by morning. Try to sleep, Shepard.”

“Yeah. So, uh, there’s no solving this problem on my own, is there?” she asked and Garrus was fascinated by the way her color changed. He’d seen it happen before during battles and she’d been flushed all through the mission on Haestrom and, in fact, on Virmire and Therum as well. The cabin wasn’t hot and she wasn’t exerting herself. She couldn’t be embarrassed, could she? Shepard didn’t get embarrassed over anything. Then, he recognized the meaning behind her question and felt the blood rush up into the back of his own neck. He violently pushed away the thought of her…solving her problem.

“No,” Mordin said. “Body’s desire is to mate. Self-gratification not the same.”

She groaned and said, “All right. Thanks, Mordin.”  
   
When Mordin left, Shepard moved to the small desk by her bed and picked up a datapad. She might as well get some work done while she was essentially confined to her cabin to keep herself from causing a diplomatic incident. A part of her couldn’t believe   
the way she’d behaved with those two turians—and one of them married! —and was glad that Garrus had intervened but another part of her was raging in frustration. 

She had managed to push back the rising tide of desire that was trying to overwhelm her in order to converse naturally with Garrus and Mordin but she didn’t know how well her self-control would hold with Garrus alone. She’d already made a fool of herself on the way back to the ship and she was just grateful that it was him and not someone like Jacob or, gods forbid, Zaeed. At least with Garrus, she knew that this was something he might tease her about later but in a good-natured manner and he would never turn it against her or tell anyone. 

She shifted uncomfortably in her chair when she thought of the way his arm had felt around her and his waist had felt under her hand. She’d felt the slight tension that had run through him and heard the slight change in his breathing. He might not have a fetish for humans and might not want her specifically but, at least for a moment, he’d been seeing her as something other than his commander and friend. 

A part of her wished that he wasn’t so disciplined. If he wasn’t, then she might be able to walk up to him and put her hand on his waist, skim her fingers under his fringe, nip the softer hide at the side of his neck. He’d tense and might even gasp or groan before directing her back until the bed hit the backs of her knees. Their fingers wouldn’t fumble on the clasps of each other’s armor as they were both familiar with it after treating countless of each other’s injuries on the field and in the back of the shuttle. They would strip each other and then he would bend over her, pushing her down onto the bed. His tongue would be rough against the skin of her throat. She’d learned that with the turian at the bar. It was nice but it would be even nicer when it was Garrus’ and trailing down her chest…

She curled her hand into a fist until her short nails were digging into her palm as she forced her thoughts away. This was Garrus she was sitting here fantasizing about! Garrus, who was her best friend. Garrus who was sitting right there on her couch reading something on his omni-tool. Garrus, who didn’t have a thing for humans. He didn’t want her. Fantasizing about him like this was a violation of his trust. It was wrong. 

Allowing herself to indulge in the fantasy for even a few moments had been a bad idea. She wanted to rip her clothes off and throw herself at him. She wanted to ride him until they both collapsed from exhaustion. She wanted…she stifled a growl of frustration and, with feigned casualty, picked up the datapad and began to pace the floor as she tried to turn her focus to the report that Tali had put together for her. If anything could cool her ardor, it should be this. She didn’t even understand half of it and wasn’t sure right now why she’d bothered to have Tali send it to her. If there was a problem, Tali would either fix it or tell Shepard what she needed to fix it and Shepard would get it for her. She didn’t need details but she’d wanted the quarian’s opinion of the new ship. She just hadn’t realized that was going to involve a report that required a quantum engineering degree to comprehend. 

The report couldn’t hold her interest and the slow pacing she was doing wasn’t enough to dispel the energy building up inside of her. This was getting uncomfortable. She tossed the datapad onto her desk below her display case and went over to press her forehead against the fish tank. She wished that she had taken Thane up on his offer to teach her meditation techniques. Perhaps that would help her now. However, bringing Thane up here was probably a worse idea than having Garrus. She knew Thane wanted her and, from a purely sexual standpoint, she wanted him. However, she didn’t just want to get laid—her present situation notwithstanding—and Thane wasn’t exactly relationship material. The dead wife, eidetic memory, and terminal illness were just too much for her. Besides, he would never be more than a second choice for her and he deserved better than that. Her heart lay with the turian sitting on the couch whether he wanted it or not.

The cool glass of the fish tank felt good against her overheated skin. She raised an arm above her head and tried to focus on the fish swimming around oblivious to everything outside of their perfect little world. She was distracted, though, by the way the light flickered and was dismayed to realize that her biotics were flaring. She was focusing so much energy on controlling her impulses that she wasn’t able to devote any to controlling her biotics.

“You all right, Shepard?” Garrus asked from behind her. She felt his hand come to rest hesitantly on her shoulder and fought the urge to lean back into him. If she did, she’d end up wrapped around him with her mouth on his and that would just make him even more uncomfortable. 

“Fine,” she bit out. “Probably not a good idea to touch me, though. Or stand that close. The other side of the Sahrabarik might be far enough away.” She banged her head lightly against the glass and the fish scattered. He stepped back and she straightened.   
“I’m going to go take a shower. A cold one. A really, really cold one.”

It turned out that cold showers didn’t work on women the way they supposedly did on men. She didn’t know if they actually worked for men or not but it certainly didn’t for her. By the time she was finished, she was just frustrated and freezing. She dried her hair with her omni-tool and pulled on the sweatpants and hoodie she’d brought in with her before going back into the cabin and climbing into bed so that she could wrap the blankets around her shivering body. She remembered the heat that had poured off of the turians in the bar and groaned. 

“I really hate you right now,” she said.

“Why?” Garrus asked with an amused chuckle.

She said, “I know your intentions were good and I’ll thank you tomorrow but right now, all I can think is that I could be in a bed with a pair of warm turians having a damn good time and, instead, I’m locked in my cabin, freezing my ass off, and am definitely not having fun. I haven’t been this cold since Noveria and I haven’t been this frustrated since I was a teenager fooling around in the shuttle bay with one of the other spacer kids and his dad caught us and made us get out of the Mako.”

“You fooled around in a Mako?” he asked incredulously.

“Don’t tell me you never thought about it,” she grumbled. “If we’d had a turian female on the first Normandy, you’d have run Ash and Wrex out of the shuttle bay in a heartbeat.”

“Mmm,” he said consideringly. “Maybe. I, uh, don’t have the best track record with women, though. I get all—what’s that human expression—tongue tied.”

“You don’t get tongue tied with me,” she muttered resentfully.

“That’s different,” he said. “You’re—”

“If you say ‘like a sister,’ I’m going to kick your ass, Vakarian,” she warned.

“What? No! No. Definitely not like a sister,” he said quickly. “You’re my best friend. I’m comfortable with you.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever been friend-zoned so nicely,” she said as lightly as she could.

“Friend zone?” he asked.

“Remember how Kaidan used to follow me around on the old _Normandy_ and I finally had to explain to him that he was just a friend?” she asked. “I friend-zoned him. Made it clear I wasn’t an option he should consider and that he needed to move on. I’d thought he had set his sights on Ash, but then Virmire…. Anyway, ‘you’re my friend and I value that’ is a pretty clear ‘I’m not interested.’ Don’t worry. I’ll get over it. For the record, though, I thought about the Mako a _lot_.”

His head snapped up at that and he rubbed the back of his neck and said, “Wait. Are you saying your, ah, interest…” he trailed off as if unsure if he should continue.

“Started a long time ago,” she admitted. “Look, I’m not going to lie about it if you ask directly but this doesn’t have to be weird. I know you don’t have a thing for humans and once this is over it will never come up again. You’re my best friend, too, and I don’t   
want that to change just because you now know something that never came up before and won’t again.”

“Huh,” he said. “Well. That, uh…that changes things.”

“Fuck,” she cursed viciously and jerked herself down onto the bed. She covered her head with the blankets to hide the shame and something else that burned her cheeks. She couldn’t remember ever feeling so miserable. She was hornier than she had ever been, more frustrated than she could imagine, and now she had ruined the friendship that had gotten her through all of the insanity that her life had become since Eden Prime. A knot rose into her throat and threatened to choke her. 

She felt the bed dip and a three-fingered hand grasp her shoulder. He tugged the blanket down and tilted her face so that she was looking at him. “Shepard,” he said and the emotion in his voice made her wince. “Ask me tomorrow, all right? I won’t take advantage of you and, hell, I don’t even know if this could work or how. But when I said it changed things, I didn’t mean that I’m not here for you. I meant that it’s something I’ve thought about, too, but I never thought you might feel the same way.”

“I’ve wanted you since…hell, I don’t remember when it started. I was sure after Virmire. When Saren had me by the throat, all I could see was you.”

“Shepard,” he said again and leaned down to press his forehead to hers. “Are you sure you don’t want something closer to home, something better? I’m not good enough. I’ve never been good at anything without you. My work at C-Sec, Omega, my family…I fail at everything when you aren’t there. You deserve better than someone you have to carry. You deserve better than a broken vigilante with more scars inside than out.”

She reached up and cupped his damaged mandible in her palm as she fought for control. “Garrus, you aren’t a failure. You didn’t fail at C-Sec. You left to help me. You didn’t fail your team. You were betrayed. No one could have seen that coming. I certainly wouldn’t have expected betrayal from within. You did good here whether you believe it or not. You did what few people in the galaxy are willing to do. You stood up for the most helpless among us and put yourself between them and those who want nothing more than to set fire to all that is good for the sake of watching it burn and you almost died for what you believed in.   
“You are the most beautiful, wonderful, amazing person in this galaxy to me, Garrus Vakarian. You’re strong and brave and compassionate and kind and just downright good and I am so damn proud of you. Don’t ever try to tell me you aren’t good enough. You are the best man I know and you’re a damn good leader.”

“How can you say that, Shepard?” he asked miserably. “I got my team killed.”

“You don’t think I felt the same way after Akuze?” she asked. “My team died because I didn’t put the pieces together fast enough. You led them for over a year in a place that is designed to take people like you and me and your team and chew us up and spit us out. You cared about them, Garrus. You loved them. You can’t tell me you didn’t do everything you could. You have to stop blaming yourself for the actions of others, sweetheart.”

“I was their leader,” he said. “It was my responsibility.”

“Then learn from it. Make it count,” she said. “You will never again make that mistake. You will never let your own feelings blind you to what is going on with your team. You will lead again and you will be better. I’m not carrying you, Garrus. You carry yourself and, hell, you carry me just as often as I do you. I couldn’t do this without you. We’re a team. We’re both better with each other. And, for the record, while I hate the reason for the scars, I think they make you look damn sexy.”


	3. Chapter 3

Garrus buried his face in her neck and laughed softly. The heat that she’d managed to tamp down while he needed her came raging back in force. Her arms went around his neck of their own volition and her head fell back as his warm breath bathed her throat, chasing away the last of the chill from her shower. He didn’t seem to register the change and his arms slid around her, making her hands clench on the ridge of plates over his spine. 

He stiffened as she arched into him. The combination of their revelations, his proximity, and finally having his arms around her shattered the last vestiges of her control. “Shit, I’m sorry,” she groaned. “I’m sorry. Fuck. Garrus, please!” Her breath came in rapid pants. She felt like her body was on fire. There was a gaping emptiness inside of her that demanded to be filled. She didn’t want the turians in the bar. She didn’t want Thane. She needed Garrus. She needed him to bite her, touch her, fuck her, love her. She needed him as badly as she’d needed air over Alchera, needed him so badly it was a physical ache in her bones, a raging inferno in her blood and she writhed against him. “Garrus, this hurts. _Help me._ Fuck me, sedate me, _something_. Please, Garrus.” 

She’d never begged a man before in her life and a part of her was ashamed at her wantonness but most of her couldn’t care. She scraped her teeth along the side of his neck and pressed herself as fully against him as she could. His scent, his heat, his ragged breath, the rumble building in his chest, the scrape of his talons along her spine as he fought valiantly for control all served to undermine the last crumbling vestiges of her own. She heard herself continuing to beg and bit down on her lip to quiet her pleas. 

He gasped as her nails raked the back of his neck. “I should go. I have to go,” he said suddenly.

She had just enough presence of mind left to release him. She couldn’t force him. She wouldn’t force him. It didn’t matter that her body and mind were screaming at her, that she was now riding the ugly side of desire, the side with teeth and talons that scraped along her bones and tore at her sanity. She wouldn’t put this on him. His arms left her as he pulled away and she bit down on the pad of flesh at the base of her thumb hard enough to flood her mouth with the coppery tang of her own blood. The pain was clarifying and she said, “Go. Get Chakwas. Knock me out. I can’t control myself anymore. Fuck! I am going to murder that goddamn batarian!”

“Spirits, Shepard!” he exclaimed, reaching for her hand. 

“It’s fine,” she insisted. “Go before I forget that I love you and jump you whether you want it or not.”

“You love me?” he asked, sounding stunned.

“You have to ask?” she countered, squeezing her eyes shut as she fisted her hands in the sheets to keep herself from reaching for him again. Damn, this hurt. She had never realized that wanting someone could hurt so badly. 

“Mordin,” he said and she realized he was on his comm. “Does Azure affect emotion or just hormones?” There was a pause and he said, “You’re sure? All right. Thanks.”

Firm hands gripped her ankles and pulled her legs down. She gasped as she felt her pants being lowered over her hips. He stripped her quickly as she opened her eyes and stared at him in confusion. “What are you doing?” she groaned.

He answered sincerely as he removed his armor, “You love me. I love you. We both want each other. Right now, it’s hurting you more to turn you down when nothing is going to change tomorrow. So if we can figure this out, I’m going to make love to my girl until it doesn’t hurt anymore.” 

“Have you ever been with a human?” she asked as she rose to her knees to help divest him of his underarmor. 

“No,” he said. “Have you ever been with a turian?”

“No,” she answered, “but I, uh, did some research a few years ago.”

“So you were rubbing my waist on purpose,” he said with a grin.

“Yep,” she answered shamelessly and tugged his head down so that his lips met hers. He was stiff and uncertain at first but he got the idea quickly and soon his tongue was in her mouth and they were tumbling back onto the bed together. Her hands flew over his plated skin, finding the softer hide between the gaps before sliding down to stroke his slim waist. He groaned into her mouth and she felt his hands slide over her body. He noted the areas that made her gasp, the ones that made her groan, and the ones that drew broken cries from her. 

He learned that she liked the sensation of his talons dragging down her back and she learned that he purred like a cat when she nipped at his undamaged mandible. He learned that scraping his teeth over her shoulder made her arch into him and rake her nails down his back and she learned that biting his neck made him go rigid and loudly groan her name. She discovered that the underside of his fringe was incredibly soft and that any touch there made his subvocals go haywire. He found that fisting his hand in the hair at the nape of her neck made her gasp his name. 

When he slid his length into her in a single smooth stroke, she cried out and wrapped herself around him as she trembled in his arms. She was whole, complete, filled in both body and soul. He buried his face in her neck again and she heard him breathe her name like a prayer. Her heart swelled and she kissed his throat as her hands roamed over his body. “You’re beautiful,” she gasped. “Gods, Garrus, you’re perfect.”

“I think that’s my line,” he said with a soft chuckle as he pressed his forehead to hers. “You’re the beautiful one.”

Her eyes widened as she felt him begin to move inside of her. It wasn’t what she’d been expecting. He didn’t thrust. He didn’t need to. His erection rippled inside of her, beginning at the base and moving to the tip, as he flexed some muscle that she hadn’t known existed and the blunt barbs that covered him rose and fell with the movement. She was overwhelmed with sensation as he held her so close to him that there wasn’t room for breath between them and she could barely tell where he ended and she began. 

“Good?” he asked in a tight voice as she gasped his name.

“Oh, gods,” she moaned and raked her nails under his fringe in reply. She let out a strangled cry when he withdrew and then hilted himself inside her again before doing that amazing ripple once more. “Oh, fuck, Garrus!” she shouted as her body bowed into him and stars burst behind her eyelids. He repeated the motion until he’d established a rhythm she could follow. He drove her beyond thought, beyond words, into a blissful incoherency as he rumbled and groaned things her translator couldn’t understand.   
His arms tightened around her and she felt his teeth close over her shoulder and hold there. She tried to push into it, to tell him without words what she wanted, what she needed, to complete this but he held his jaws still and didn’t pierce the skin. She fought to pull herself back until words could form once more and gasped, “Bite me, Garrus.”

Instead, he released her and brought his forehead to hers again without breaking his rhythm of withdraw, thrust, ripple, repeat. “Shepard,” he moaned. “You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“I do,” she insisted. “I love you. I’ve always loved you. I will always love you. I’m yours, body, heart, and soul. Bite me, Garrus. Mark me.”

He whispered her name and replaced his teeth on her shoulder. She turned her head so that her own teeth were on his neck. He cupped her head in his hand, pressing her against him in silent consent as he shifted his angle slightly to allow her to reach with her differing physiology. His free hand slid beneath her hips and lifted her to him as he picked up both speed and force until he was slamming into her as his control rapidly unraveled. When he felt her tighten against him as the first wave of her orgasm hit, he tightened his jaws and she felt his teeth slide into her skin. Her own jaw locked down and, after a moment of resistance from his thicker hide that he seemed to ignore, she felt his skin break and the sweet, tangy flavor of his blood filled her mouth. He groaned loudly as his body tensed and she felt him spill himself hot and viscous inside of her. 

They lay where they were, breathing heavily and clinging to each other, as they returned to themselves. She felt his teeth withdraw from her skin and then the rough lap of his tongue against the pinprick wounds. He cleaned the blood away and then looked at her. “Are you sure about this, Shepard?” he asked breathlessly. “Last chance.”

“I’m sure. Are you?” she asked nervously.

“Definitely,” he said with a shy smile. He reached up and coated his fingers with his cobalt blood and then wiped it into the mark on her shoulder. 

“What about you?” she asked and he carefully scratched the scab that had formed over the ball of her thumb before pressing it to his own neck. 

“It’s done,” he said and looked down into her eyes. “I love you, Shepard.”

“I love you, too, Garrus,” she said.

He rolled onto his side and tucked her up beside him. Her release had eased the urgency and his talons sliding gently over her back relaxed her. She breathed in the scent of him and felt the tension flow out of her body as he nuzzled her hair. Sleep crept in and claimed them both and, when they woke, they reached for each other again. Their lovemaking was slow and gentle as they reaffirmed the declarations of the night before.

On Omega, Aria smiled.


End file.
